Wedding Speeches: A Complete Guide

Written By Jack Smithies

Everything you need to know about wedding speeches

A wedding speech is not just a tradition - it’s a meaningful, emotional, and often an unforgettable highlight of the day. As a wedding videographer, I’ve seen my fair share of wedding speeches. Along the way, I’ve gathered plenty of insights into what truly makes a speech shine. This guide brings together all of that experience in one convenient place.

A groom directs his speech to his new bride

WHO SHOULD MAKE A SPEECH?

Traditionally, speeches come from the Father of the Bride, Groom, and Best Man, but there’s no rule saying you must follow this format. Nowadays, brides, Maids of Honour, and the mums often take the mic, sharing personal stories and spreading the love. If you’re planning speeches, aim for just three or four key speakers to keep things flowing.

 

The traditional wedding speakers and their most common focus:

  • Father of the Bride – Traditionally kicks things off with a warm welcome, shares a few fond memories, and expresses pride and happiness for the newlyweds.

  • Groom – Thanks guests for attending, acknowledges family and wedding party, shares appreciation for their new spouse.

  • Best Man – Usually delivers a speech packed with personal anecdotes, and a heartfelt tribute to the groom and the couple’s relationship.

 

Other speeches may include:

  • Maid of Honour – Shares meaningful stories about the bride and celebrates the couple’s connection.

  • Bride – Expresses gratitude, shares personal thoughts about the day and marriage, and may include a toast to loved ones.

  • Parents of the Groom – Sometimes offer a short speech welcoming the bride into their family and expressing good wishes.

 

WHEN SHOULD SPEECHES HAPPEN?

Speeches work best before or just after the wedding breakfast. Avoid mid-meal interruptions - it’s a headache for caterers and can make the atmosphere feel chaotic. Nervous speakers might prefer to get it done early so they can relax. If you have a videographer, post-meal speeches allow them to prep their equipment properly during the wedding breakfast without missing moments from the reception.

HOW LONG SHOULD SPEECHES LAST?

As a wedding videographer, I’ve seen everything from three-minute speeches to marathon monologues exceeding an hour - trust me, shorter is sweeter. Each speaker should aim for five to ten minutes to maintain engagement and keep guests comfortable. A total run time of 20–30 minutes usually lands best. If you predict your speeches will be significantly longer or shorter, let your venue know so they can adjust the schedule.

Groom delivers an emotional wedding speech

Delivering the perfect speech

PREPARING YOUR SPEECH

  • Keep It Concise: Aim for five to ten minutes, sticking to meaningful, heartfelt moments.

  • Be Yourself: Inspiration is great, but the best speeches are personal and genuine - skip the generic Google jokes.

  • Think About Your Audience: Match the speech tone to the vibe of the day, avoiding anything too controversial.

  • Consider Other Speakers: Understanding who else is speaking and their likely topics can help you avoid repetition

  • Write It Down: Having a written version helps with practicing and can be a lifesaver if nerves kick in. Cue cards work wonders - just number them to avoid confusion!

 

THINGS TO INCLUDE

While the structure of a wedding speech is pretty similar for everyone, your connection to the couple and your role in the day will shape the areas you focus on.

  • A warm introduction – Start by introducing yourself and your connection to the couple.

  • Gratitude – Thank everyone for being there and acknowledge those who made the day special. If applicable, don’t forget to thank the previous speaker for their words.

  • A personal story – Share a touching or funny memory you have with the couple or with them individually, focus on particular traits that will make them a good husband, wife or partnership.

  • Words about the couple – Talk about what makes them great together and why they’re a perfect match.

  • A heartfelt message – Express your wishes for their future and offer any words of wisdom or encouragement.

  • A toast – Wrap it up by inviting everyone to raise a glass in celebration of the newlyweds. If you ask the guests to stand, please be aware that it can take longer for them to settle and people often block camera angles trying to capture the moment.  


DELIVERING YOUR SPEECH

  • Slow Down: People tend to rush when nervous. Add pauses, and if laughter or applause erupts, wait for it to settle before continuing.

  • Stay Still: Moving around can be distracting for guests. Stand near the couple for the best visibility.

  • Make Eye Contact: Engaging with the audience boosts confidence and keeps your speech impactful. When engaging with the bride and groom, try to avoid turning away from the guests.

  • Ad-lib Where Needed: Reacting to the words of the previous speaker or making light of a funny ceremony moment adds a natural touch.

  • Use the Microphone Properly: Hold it a few inches from your mouth, avoiding covering the top. If the videographer attaches additional mics to your clothing, let them know about any outfit changes.

 

two bridesmaids deliver speech to wedding guests in rustic barn

If you have any further questions about wedding speeches, or would like to discuss capturing your big day on film, please feel free to get in touch.

Jack Smithies